Unconsolability
by valeskathesilverwolf
Summary: Dean wasn't sure when his friendship with Cas started to deteriorate, but he's stuck with the mess now. No matter how much he's mad at Cas, he can't choose him. He can't choose anyone. He won't condemn anyone to die, but this guy didn't get that memo.


**A/N: This is a fic requested by Promise777. Filled with angst and hurt/comfort. It may make you cry, it made me cry, but I just watched Titanic for the first time so I may be "over emotional." ****As far as the angel names go, I'm not sure about Ariel and Ramiel, but Zadiel ****is one I looked up and got actual info on. **

**Spoilers: Set after 5x10, how far after that I'm not sure. **

**Disclaimer: If I owned it I wouldn't be writing it here, it would be on TV. **

**Pairings: Gen, with a lot of bromance :)**

**other A/N: Hope this is a good start Promise777  
**

* * *

Castiel doesn't understand Dean's love of music.

He knows _of_ music, of course. In Heaven the angels chorused together in pure harmony. Gabriel played the horn. The sounds rang throughout Heaven so much that there was hardly ever a quiet moment. The only time it was silent was in the times of great seriousness. Lucifer declaring his rebellion was the one he was able to remember the clearest. He had been nothing more than a fledgling at the time, but he noticed the silence. He noticed the way Heaven remanded quiet with anger. Lucifer was cast down into hell, and the music continued on. However, it continued on with more weariness than before, as to reflect the grief of the angels.

Dean's music was _different_ than the music Castiel knew. According to Sam, Dean's taste in music was old and outdated. Castiel, personally didn't think music could be outdated, it's not perishable like food. Dean never paid Sam any mind about it, and more than once increased the volume of the music.

Dean was convinced that Castiel needed to know the importance of the "greats." He had no idea who the "greats" were and always became confused when Dean started talking about them. He tried to understand the importance of _Guns and Roses, _(he couldn't relate the two together, as they were such opposites) _Journey, _(Sam and Dean journeyed many different places, and he could understand how Dean would like it) and AC/DC (he gave up on understanding this one).

Dean's music was loud and aggressive. It hardly ever had any soothing qualities as the Heavenly chorus did. His charge listened to it so loud that Castiel assumed that if he was human he would have gained several headaches, as Sam called it.

Despite their…disagreements in what music was, Castiel found himself liking to ride around the Impala with Dean listening to his music. That's what brought him here to _Jim's Bake n' Go_ in the outskirts of the town in Utah. Dean called him minutes earlier and requested that he join them. He located Dean's car, and assumes that the Winchesters must be already inside. He moves to make his way inside, when he feels it. It's nothing more than the prickling on the back of his neck, but he recognizes the feeling. There are angels close by here, and whether or not they are coming after the Winchesters is uncertain.

No angels should have been able to locate the Winchesters, due to the enochian sigil carved into their ribs. That left the possibility that they were coming after him though. He wouldn't willingly put the Winchesters in danger, but he couldn't assume they were coming after him. If he was to leave, and angels had managed to find Sam and Dean…no, it wouldn't come to that. He wouldn't let it come to that. He was going to have to take a risk on his part, but anything was better than Zachariah finding out the location of Dean.

He took flight, and tried to home in on the offending angels' grace. He would follow them, and if they got too close as to endanger his charges, then he would have no choice other than to lead them off the trail.

Castiel only sensed three of them. It was better than he had hoped, but more than he would had liked. Three angels could mean that a patrol was sent out, or they were dispatched to look for something. Castiel couldn't take any risks in this situation. Even if the angels weren't directly threatening him or the Winchesters, they would follow orders. All angels had orders to capture Sam and Dean, and he was to be killed on sight, marked as a traitor. He drew closer to the angels, and felt pity when he recognized the grace. It was Ariel and Ramiel, plus one he didn't recognize. Ariel and Ramiel had been a part of his garrison; they had fought together for centuries, but they would follow orders as well as any other angel. It wouldn't matter if they were close siblings that had been with each other since birth.

He stayed far enough away from him, so he wouldn't give away his position. They were conversing with each other about something, but Castiel couldn't hear what they were saying from this distance. He lost that ability several months ago while in Brazil searching for his father.

He hoped that his grace was dampened enough that the other angels couldn't sense his presence, but he wasn't usually _that _lucky.

As if to confirm his though, the cell phone in his pocket rang. He may have reduced abilities from falling, but the other angels didn't. They heard the sound immediately, turning around to face the direction he was in.

"Dammit." Castiel cursed, a habit learned from Dean.

Before he could even think of moving, Ariel was behind him, Ramiel appeared in front of him, and the unknown angel's fist connected with his face.

He stumbled back from the punch, but recovered in a second. He dropped his sword from its holster into his hand, and swung out in attack. The angel dodged his blade, and dropped down his own sword.

"Castiel." Ramiel snarled. "Zachariah will be pleased. This was just a scouting mission, imagine how joyed he will be when we bring back your corpse."

It felt as if his vessel's…Jimmy's stomach knotted together with the statement. He knew this was a human emotion, but he had no way of recognizing it.

"You haven't changed." He remarked to Ramiel, watching as the pale, freckled face twisted in anger.

"Yet you have." Ariel told him. She stood in a battle stance, one he had seen many times, but the sword wasn't raised to attack. "You're weakened."

"Makes it all the easier," commented the angel. His vessel was almost twice the size of Jimmy, and his hair was short and cropped. Ink showed under the short sleeves of his vessel's tight black shirt. He moved forward, sword raised to strike him in the throat.

"Zadiel." Ariel scolded. "Have you forgotten who is in charge?"

Zadiel stood back and cleared his throat. "Forgive me sister. I let my…eagerness to end the traitor get the best of me."

Zadiel was the angel of refinement, invocation, and transformation. He was known for his violence and his loyalty to Raphael. Raphael must have loaned him to Zachariah.

"Castiel," Ariel stepped forward, her sword by her side. "I will only ask this once. Will you come with us willingly?" The wind made her vessel's long brown hair fly into her face, covering it so he wasn't able to see it. He hoped that it showed some emotion, that Ariel wasn't like the others.

He looked down at his feet and sighed. He was going to have to kill them, or die trying. He could give in now, and go home. He wouldn't have to fight any longer. Granted, he would be killed and marked as a traitor along with being dammed to hell. His phone made itself known from his pocket, and he jolted back into reality.

He looked up with a fierceness shinning in his eyes. "No."

Ariel nodded her head. "You leave me no other choice then, Castiel." She raised her sword. "Kill him."

Zadiel was the first to jump at him. His blade moved to strike him in the throat. He ducked down out of the way. Reaching up, he grabbed the angel's arm and used what little was left of his powers to launch an attack of grace towards Zadiel's face. It made a direct hit and he Zadiel was launched out of his sight, hopefully not to return for a while.

He let himself become distracted for too long, and Ramiel's blade grazed his elbow. It didn't damage much as it was not a direct hit, but it stung terribly. Ramiel swung wildly hoping to make another hit. Ramiel let his drive to succeed get in the way of correct fighting. The move was sloppy and gave Castiel the perfect opening. He felt regret as he swung his blade down and hit Ramiel directly in the chest.

The angel gave a gasp and his eyes opened wide, his vessel's ginger colored hair fell into his face. Without another second gone by Ramiel's grace burned out. He yanked his sword from the corpse.

"I'm sorry." He murmured to the dead angel.

Ariel gave a yowl of anger knocked into him. Castiel went flying into a nearby tree, and felt the plant shake. Ariel appeared above him and tried to shove her sword into his chest. He grabbed her wrists and struggled to keep the sword away from him.

"You are a _traitor!_" She hissed. "I didn't want to believe it, but you're just like _him._ You're just like Lucifer!"

Castiel felt the anger spill over. He snarled at Ariel. "I am _nothing like him!_" He used his last bit of strength to turn the direction of the blade around and shove it through Ariel's chest. Her grace burned out in his face and she fell on top of him. He scrambled out from underneath his dead sister. He stood panting in the middle of a forest. The sun was setting making the light turn a deeper yellow color. The two pairs of wings were burned into the forest floor. Grief overcame Castiel and he sighed with sadness.

The sound of chuckling brought his attention behind him. Zadiel held his arm as if he was in pain and his sword wasn't in sight.

"You really are a murderous little traitor aren't you, little Castiel. The other angels, they know how to keep in line and not question orders. But you are too damn curious for your own good." He turned around and moved to take off. "I will see you soon, Castiel. Next time I will end you."

Zadiel disappeared and Castiel almost fell from weariness. His phone rang yet again, and he reached into his pocket and answered it.

"Dean-"

"Where the hell were you?" Dean yelled at him.

"I had…other business to attend to." He said.

"Get your ass here now! Cherry Motel room 17."

"Is something wrong-"

"And hurry up!" Dean ended the call. Castiel got the feeling that something bad had happened while he was fighting.

* * *

Castiel arrived in the motel room to see an angry Dean, and Sam laying down on a bed. There were bloody bandages strewn across the room and Dean's sleeves and shirt was splattered with blood.

"Is Sam alright?" He asked.

Dean turned a bright red color and a vain popped out in his forehead. "NO! He is _not _alright. We got ambushed by demons at the diner. Of course you wouldn't know about that because you had 'other business to attend to!"

"Dean-"

"Save it Cas. I'm too tired to hear your excuses right now." Dean dropped down on the bed beside Sam and held his head in his hands.

"I would heal Sam if I was able, but-" Cas started.

"You're running low on mojo. I get it Cas." Dean sighed.

"I'm sorry I wasn't able to help you, but-"

"But you should have been. You weren't and there is nothing you can do to change that." Dean stood up and started pacing. "If you're not going to even show up when we need help then why even come around at all? Just go look for God and leave us the hell alone."

Hurt stabbed Castiel through the chest. His knees wanted to buckle and he felt something unpleasant stirring in his stomach. He looked at Dean and saw his anger at him for not being able to help Sam. Castiel could plead his case to Dean, but he was too tired and not willing to stay somewhere he wasn't wanted.

"Very well, Dean." He took one last look at the man he called a friend and his charge. "I'll still come if you need my help."

He left the motel room and flew straight to an empty park a few miles away. He was too drained to fly any further and his wound from where Ramiel grazed him ached. Castiel sat down on a bench that overlooked a small pond. It started to rain, but he couldn't find himself to care.

"Father…I don't know what to do."


End file.
